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On why the purpose of life is less about renunciation and more about acceptance and giving back…
Mark Twain once said: “There are 2 very important days in a person’s life. The day he was born and the day he found his purpose.”
I left India and landed in Curacao in 1995. I had nothing to call my own when I came except a will to make it in life. I was part of the great Indian middle class that always had too much month left at the end of money! Even when fortunes started soaring, I wasn’t satisfied or happy with what I had and sought more. More of what? Even that wasn’t clear then for me. It was a distressing and confusing state for a mind to be in.
In 2003 summer of came down to India on a vacation. While there I went on to visit a swami (A guru or a seer) and spent some time talking to him. Out of the blue the guru looked at me intently and said:
“Son, there are 2 kinds of monks. The first kind are the ones that renounce everything and typically live under vows of poverty, chastity, obedience, and humility. He withdraws from this world in quest of spirituality and goes seeking enlightenment. Then there is a second kind of monk. The one who goes on to create a wonderful world and attains enlightenment by sallying forth into the challenges of life, working hard and growing wealthy and giving it back to the world by finding a purpose in his life…
Son, I believe you are the second kind. You will go into this world and acquire a life purpose that is going to not only touch you but also the people around you. Get to doing it right now!”
I was flabbergasted and felt that perhaps he read my mind. I always had the hidden yearning to be an ascetic but on the outside I aspired to be a successful and respected businessman and a family man who would be admired by the community, friends and family. I was known to lead a very colorful life. I was a chain smoker and quite a heavy drinker and was visibly unfit at just 38 years. I had worked very hard to cultivate the image of a fun loving, easy going guy; an image that I loved living up to as well
When I came back home, whatever he said, had subconsciously started to motivate me. I went on with my worldly life without renouncing the material aspects of it. My quest for knowledge and focused efforts to gain the right knowledge propelled me to succeed. During this wondrous journey of self-realization I discovered why my purpose encompassed everything that I had achieved and lived for. This journey has helped me be a better person for myself, my family, my friends and for the community that I live in. It helped me understand what it means to be really a monk – a worldly monk who accepts and renounces! The only crucial difference was that I no longer bothered about being liked by others but focused my efforts on building my self-worth which makes everything else immaterial.
On that scorching summer day in Chennai, the swami saw my capacity to reinvent myself and be of some value to this world; the capacity I could not see for myself then; but, can do so now with extreme clarity. Two decades later, here I am. His words had a tremendous impact on me and I worked towards making it my purpose of life!
While I am in my path of finding purpose, I realized that there are some misgivings that limit people when in search of it:
That it has to be lofty and of superhuman standards: While it is infinitely noble to be able to, and to be in a position to give back to the society, not everyone can be a Mother Theresa, Warren Buffet or Nikolai Tesla. Not everyone needs to aspire for it either. Every single person born on the face of earth comes with their own unique character, talent, skill, power and is engaged in an individual sphere of activity. It could be entrepreneurship, finance, science and technology, medicine, space research, agriculture, food or anything at all. Loftiness is only in the attitude with which a person functions and doing one’s best.
That it is only the sacrifices made that defines the purpose of life: Renunciation and living in caves inside mountains are not a prerequisite to lead a purposeful, enlightened life. Nor is life in poverty a precondition for life to me meaningful. People leading joy-filled rich lives spread joy to everyone around them. When a person is happy doing their work and contributing in even the smallest way to the happiness of people in their closest circle, the purpose of their life is achieved. Life on a daily basis involves sacrifices and compromises. They are an integral part of defining the purpose as much as sacrifices and giving back.
That it is for a particular set of people; like rich, successful etc – Class is also of no consequence when it comes to leading purposeful lives. The work of a Mason or carpenter is as important in the finished magnificence of a building as much as the efforts of a CEO of the company or the architects and engineers involved in the project. Every human has the inherent capacity to make a difference. Not success nor exclusivity, but excellence is what needs to be pursued. Success is a byproduct and it has many definitions; Money and power being just some of them.
That their sphere of activity is too small to count for having a purpose of life – Someone involved in household chores and upkeep, taking care of their parents, children or partner also has a very important role in the success of the family and of the society. Every single role has significance in the grand scheme of life. Purpose of life is derived by focusing on the particular sphere of activity in which you excel and fulfilling the duties to the best of your capacity.
As for me, I attained my life purpose when I defined my vision to enable outstanding people, products and services. I do acknowledge the role of serendipity in my path. Yet, not having made my own efforts in seeking the right path and right knowledge could have kept me away from success. It has been an incredible journey and it is for everyone to undertake to bring about a change – a change in oneself and a positive change in the world around them. Surely if the guru were to hear it, he would nod in agreement. He would perhaps urge me to hasten the book which I am working on for the benefit of others around me who seek the purpose of life, like I did long ago!
If you are looking for some help with understanding and incorporating a significant purpose into your career and life do write to us at harish@harishrao.world to know how we can help you with it. We would love to work with you in defining your life’s vision and mission as well!
